Tony Blair's secret plan.

The Plan

The plan should not have been complicated, except that the mind-boggling incompetence of Gordon is threatening to derail it. Tony Blair set about appeasing, bribing and empowering every minority he could think of. By this means you secure them as long term supporters and voters.

Labour has their long-standing traditional strongholds, just as the Tories have. To this you add the Gay community by giving them equal rights in every area of life, even ridiculous things such as adoption. Gay marriages, clergy etc.

Then you go very soft on immigration and asylum seekers, ensuring that the population of this country goes up by ten million in 12 years. Mainly natural Labour voters.

The Muslim community are appeased in every area possible. Mosques can be built anywhere. Apart from the hiccup of the Iraq war, he secured the long-term allegiance of the two million strong Islamic community.

The next big step is to devolve political powers to Scotland (which secured over 70 seats for Labour last time) Wales and Northern Ireland. Money by the Billion is poured into these regions with relatively small populations and they become natural Labour strongholds. I think he failed in Ireland.

Then you push and push for the EC to vastly expand. Only the UK among the large countries have unrestricted access for EC workers such as Poles. He even tried to bring in Turkey with its 80 million largely poor and uneducated population. This could still happen.

Then he makes it know that he will convert to Roman Catholicism when he leaves office, hoping to secure many Catholic votes. Also he hoped he could become President of Europe this way, but that failed.

You put all these appeased and bribed-for voters together with the traditional Labour heartlands and you have an eternal built-in Labour majority. Just to make sure, he commissions a boundary review that somehow comes up with the result that the Tories now have to get 8.1% more voted than Labour just to be equal in seats - bizarre.

If the Tories get enough seats to form the next government, it will be a political miracle.

Had I been born a Welshman

Had I been born a Welshman,
my mam would have called me Dai
For Wales I’d have played rugby
And at Twickenham scored a try.
I’d be in the Pontypool front row,
A half ton of blubber from head to toe

Had I been born a Welshman
My granddad would have been a miner.
I’m sure he would have known Lloyd George
And I would always have voted Labour.
Yes, I’d carry the torch for my valley
But vacation each year in Miami.

Of course I would speak such perfect Welsh
And pronounce those difficult long names
And I’d know the best way to cook leeks
And be glad we had Welsh language telly.
To preserve our language we must try,
Though I myself would always watch Sky.

The coal mines are all gone you see
And we’re not much good in a factory.
Only the grass for our sheep is now free
I think I have to become Tory
The evil EC with that crafty old Kinnock
Would have us in the Euro in a blink!

So keep a welcome in the valley
When I come home to Wales.
‘Cause I have a good job in Bromley,
And good pay from computer sales.
O yes I like to visit the Rhonda
But I’m glad I don’t have to live there.