Generation Me continued

One of the saddest effects of the Gem's mindset is the effect on them when they get married. They fall in love - but they have little idea of what love really is. Marriage is going to be like being single, except much more fun. The idea of commitment and sacrificing for someone else, bending to an other's ideas of what their life might be like is so foreign, problems soon arise. All of a sudden, there is another person, with their own needs and wants to consider. Now, they are not the only centre of their attention.

Then, shock horror, sex is not exactly like it is portrayed in the films from Hollywood. Even this requires consideration of someone else's needs.

Sadly this is leading to a shocking amount of divorce at an early stage of the marriage. Finding out that their spouse may have something different they want to do next weekend comes as a shock. They have always done what they wanted and don't see why it can't be the same now they are married.

The various pre-marriage courses do not deal anywhere near enough with this condition, mainly because it is not recognised. An African friend who preached at my son's wedding siad an interesting thing. "When you go to college, you study hard and then get a certificate. In marriage, you get the certificate at the beginning and then you have to begin to study hard!"